Yet Again.

I’m out of commission… this is getting really old.  It feels like I have been at work like half the days I should have because of various ailments and vacations in 2012.  This year is already off to a rough start and I am only 25 days in!!!

And this time what did I do you might ask?  Hurt my back.  Like I cannot actually stand up straight right now :(  I really don’t know how I managed this but this morning I got up, felt fine, went for a good run, got back, started feeling like my back was tired but didn’t think much of it and drove to work.  By the time I got to work and got out of my car to walk in, I realized something was not good.  As in, I could not stand up straight nor walk right.  Excellent.

I ended up going home from work because I literally could not walk down the hall to use the restroom or even really move out of my chair.  I was seriously freaked out by the whole ordeal and really did not like the claustrophobic feeling I was getting by my inability to move.  Once I finally got home, I applied an Icy Hot patch and sat against a heating pad the rest of the night.  Exciting.

This “injury” could not come at a more depressing time.  This weekend I was scheduled to run my first 16 mile run.  16 miles was the distance I could never conquer last time I was training for a marathon and here I am, yet again, unable to go this distance.  Seriously, what did I do to wind up in this place, yet again?  Thankfully, this issue is still plenty of weeks before my marathon but it still freaks me out…because what if there is a “next time”?

At times like this, I always get all crabby and anti-running and find myself wondering why I even bother going after my goals because something ALWAYS comes up to get in my way.  Forgive my momentary rant here but I feel like I really don’t ask for much in life and really don’t have that many hobbies that I enjoy and yet I still can’t even manage to fully enjoy running as my hobby because of stupid thing like this!  I realize that this is temporary (hopefully) and will soon be a distant memory like my IT Band issue awhile back but still it frustrates me to no end!  I just get so stir crazy with the thought of not being able to run or exercise like I am used to!  Gah!

I’ve put this in posts before but for some reason, I always need to re-read it when I get injured to remind my future healthy running self to never take a run for granted!

I am a runner.  And without running, I feel like I’m missing something important in my life.  And I don’t like how that feels…

Dear Back,

Please get better soon.  I promise to always stretch right and foam roll to keep you from getting over worked in the future.  I promise to work towards having better posture.  I promise to do more lower back exercises to keep you stronger.  I will consider finding a chiropractor to keep you aligned.  So please, please, please, let me be able to stand up straight soon.

Thanks,

One Discouraged Runner.